MEET BOTSHELO MOTUBA



Tell us about the day your son was born. 



I knew on the day he was born that my life would forever be more blessed and enriched. I was mentally prepared for the next step in this journey. Labour is extremely intense as any mother will explain. I had all the support I needed on the day/night and although birth lasted many hours, it was extremely rewarding to know that I had succeeded in bringing our son safely into our lives. Genesis Clinic was amazing and I recommend it to any woman considering natural birth. Due to certain complications, I eventually had to have an emergency ceasarian which traumatised me for a while, however, at that moment, it was important to deliver a healthy young man. The most amazing part of that is my son wakes up at the exact time he was born 3 years down later. I think that’s pretty special.





His personality ...


Khumo (meaning wealth in Setswana) wakes up singing every morning. He is a very handsome child. He laughs, cracks jokes, gives you a big hug and wipes your tears. He wishes you a good day every morning and sweet dreams before bed. He is a charming young man. Anyone that encounters him will testify that is an amazing human being. I find him to be very smart and athletic. He enjoys kicking a soccer ball, riding his bike, running around our home and swimming with his Dad. He loves having company at home and demands attention from everyone. He loves cars and helps me wash the car and sits in the driver’s seat pretending to drive (one day I’m gonna find my car gone!)



Khumo and I engage in many activities as Mother and son. We cook together, we draw together. The one thing I enjoy doing the most is singing in the bath together and practising his nursery rhymes. It takes me back to my childhood – a very happy place. We also take walks in our neighbourhood, Parkhurst, which is breathtaking because of its surroundings.





What is your work life balance? 

I work in the media industry which demands a lot of my energy and time. I work in an advertising agency in the Communications and Insights department. I have an Honours Degree in International Relations from Wits and the use various skills I learnt to research various topics that feed into the relative Strategic and Creative outputs. I entered this part of the media industry as I wanted to see if my academic brain and training would be able to add value to this fast paced, cunning and ever changing space. I have also worked for different brands, a radio station and now in advertising. It takes time to achieve a work/life balance. Besides my day job, I engage myself in events happening in Joburg and travel as often as possible. I have a thirst for knowledge so I engage people from many different spheres of life. I attend many events that feed my passion of film, music, fashion. I am generally very restless so I need to make sure that I am constantly doing something that feeds my curious mind.

I am approaching a point where my life is more structured. I consider carefully which events to attend and when to say no! Most weekends I spend with my son and during the week I do my best not to work too late. I think in the near future I will be more particular about who I hang out with and where I go so that this balance is achieved sooner.



Adjusting to motherhood has been … 
It is a constant journey of growth. As my child becomes more independent, I find myself wondering what role I play in his life and what influence I play. He is a boy and I grew up in a household filled with women so that on its own has been a heavy adjustment. Boys are rough! I enjoy learning every day.

I enjoy being a Mother to Khumo – he makes it a lot easier. I see Motherhood as an extension of my personality and so it has not been too demanding on my emotions. I am very blessed.




Whats been the most surprising aspect of motherhood? 

I am a creature of love and have been surrounded by love my entire life. Carrying a child is such a blessing; God has favoured me to bring this beautiful child into the world. I will always be a part of something precious. The most surprising aspect is how much more I would appreciate my parents. I understand them far better now than when I was growing up. I understand the sacrifices they made, the love they gave to me that has shaped the lady I am today.



How would you describe your home? 
We have a beautiful home in Parkhurst, one of the last surviving neighbourhoods in Johannesburg. We have a small community of families that are always meeting and engaging with each other. It really is a beautiful area to live and grow a family.

Our home is relatively big so we have family areas as well as the space to be on your own – which my partner and I believe is very important. My partner grew up on a farm and I grew up in spacious homes too, so we understand the importance of space and area to be yourself within the homestead. Khumo has his own play areas; my partner has space to paint; and I have an area to read and write. We love our home. It is modest but growing. We have decorated the walls with my partner’s paintings which I believe adds a special touch and very intimate. It is a work in progress, and growing into a beautiful living space.

I feel very comfortable at home, which is necessary for me. It makes me feel safe. Home has always been a sanctuary for me. Even now when we travel to my Dad’s home or my partner’s home in Natal; I feel warmth and love; and this is what I am trying to build in our home.






What is your parenting philosophy? 
I was raised very disciplined and find myself repeating the same things my parents would say to me. It’s true what they say that you grow into your parents. He must understand that we are not friends, I am the parent; he is the child. When he grows older, we may become friends, but currently he must not take chances. His Dad was also raised very strict and instills the same value system that he was raised with. The best thing is that our child’s first words were “Thank you”. That let me know we were doing something right. My partner and I take turns in playing ‘good cop, bad cop’ depending on the situation at hand. However, we have similar family structures where Dad is head of the house, Mom is the nurturer; and it is playing itself out in this way as well in our young home.



What do you want most for your son? 
I want Khumo to experience as many beautiful things that life has to offer. I insist he learn about culture, language and tradition. I want him to travel every where; he must play as often as possible; and laugh all the time. Most importantly, he must love. Then he will grow into the handsome man he is meant to be; who is kind and sensitive, and loves people and his surroundings, while playing.




Parenting advice.
Do not buy too many clothes and accessories when the child is born. We tend to exaggerate what it actually takes to raise a child. It needs food, love and shelter. I was fortunate to receive many things from everybody but seeing that I am a simple person, I found myself sterilizing bottles in a pot on the stove; I threw nappies in the bin outside, and not in the fancy nappy bin. Keep it simple and be practical.


Check out the blog again for a peek into the life of yet another JOHO MOM. 
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JOHO MOMS is about bringing motherhood into a relatable, inspiring and aspiring space. I wanted to create a space where mothers felt safe enough to share their respective challenges, their highlights as well as our parenting philosophies to fellow newbies. If you'd like to share your story please email johomoms@gmail.com - Our passions, spaces and children

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